By Holley Kelley, M.S., C.P.G., FT
In a recent conversation with a friend, we were discussing something that could have potentially unfolded problematic regarding someone we cared about. During this discussion I said that all will be well if the individual would just pause long enough to “move themselves out of their own way.” The person I was talking to was perplexed and asked me, “What do you mean by that?” I simply responded by saying, “We are usually our own biggest obstacle between what we want and need, and where we are headed. WE single-handedly often prevent our own selves from arriving at our desired destination.” I went on to describe how as human beings, we carry a lot of baggage—and those bags are weighed down with debilitating burdens, such as fears, doubts, ego, anger, expectations, negative self-talk, and so much more. Our own personal, self-destructing arsenal that we use against ourselves is the barricade between floundering in a state of negative stagnation to flourishing and blossoming to the full and amazing potential of which we are capable and intended!
Unfortunately, the status quo is often much easier because it is our comfort zone. It requires doing much of nothing. Stepping outside the invisible box of security as we define it—and reaching beyond our scope of control lends us to the one potential vulnerable consequence our ego is often not willing to endure—that being the Big “F” word. When that “F” word is attached to “YOU” it becomes personal.
You know what I mean—right? Failure!? YOU are a failure. But is trying and not succeeding really a failure? Isn’t trying a recognized strength of determination and personal gain of triumph of our own soul’s righteous journey of life evolution? Well, ONLY if we move OURSELVES out of our own way long enough to credit trying and not winning as a success! You see, we often are caught in an unknown and subconscious battle of who we think we should be, who we want to be, and even who we want others to perceive us to be. It’s a mixed up collage that makes for a confusing hodge-podge of inner perplexity and encumbering individual turmoil.
It’s simple to sort out if you’re brave, honest, and willing. Just ask yourself to be genuinely authentic. Sit and get real with your original self. Ask yourself what you truly want out of life or the situation you are pondering. Be careful not to allow other people’s hopes and wishes for you to bleed over and confuse your clarity. This is your evaluation and ruling of personal judgment based on life wishes and preferences. Only you are writing the story of your life. Nobody else gets to decide. But take heed; be your own best advocate. Be careful not to set yourself up for comfort here by not pushing yourself to your full potential. If you know certain things you are doing do not serve your best interest, it is time to rise and leave old habits behind and replace them with new ones that serve your new best self. Be passionate. Get excited. Dig deep to find out what makes your soul smile and your heart glow.
Moving yourself out of your own way is a continual journey of self-discovery, personal checks and balances, and sometimes even unnerving. It requires being incredibly brave and painfully truthful with yourself. When we are in our own way, we don’t have to face certain life unpleasantries which are many, such as:
- Admitting we’re wrong.
- Trying new things when we fear them even though they may be our heart’s desire.
- Expanding our reach for fear of falling or failing.
- Swallowing our pride.
- Admitting we need help.
- Admitting what we’re doing isn’t working.
- Admitting we’re in over our head.
- The worst of all, self-reflection.
And the list goes on. So you can see why it is so easy for us to fall into, and easily embrace, this protective be-it-as-it-may inhibiting pattern.
Facing life matters is part of our human personal development journey. It allows us to transition and evolve as we advance to higher levels of mind, body, and spiritual elevations. And by doing so we can embrace life with total freedom and transparency—without limitations—and absolutely live our BEST LIFE NOW with flair, finesse, and FUNctionality!